NOBODY expects a birthday party!

Well, I am finally updating again! THREE CHEERS FOR THE [real] EX-PARROT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have several interesting parties to tell about. Because since the last post, both Karl AND Bernard have grown a whole year older! But they had one last fling before their sudden leap towards maturity, which is the first topic of this post.

One day, Karl and Bernard were talking to their friends, Cassius and Jwannhn. They discovered to their utter shock and horror that Cassius had NEVER EVER EVER seen the ultimate chick-flick:Pride and Prejudice. Eager to patch this dreadful hole in her education, they plotted (with the help of Jwannhn's mother) to have an all-night P&P viewing. For some reason, they thought that their good buddies, Cornelius and Logkan had been involved in the plans. This lead to [drumroll, please!]

THE EX-PARROT, Episode 20488291: "The Best Laid Plans o' Mice and Men gang aft agley"

[cue cheesey music]

STARRING




It all started when Karl, Bernard, and Jwannhn learned to their utter horror and dismay that Cassius had never EVER seen that masterpiece in classic-turned-cinema, Pride and Prejudice. In order to patch the hole in the ship of Cassius' cultural education before it sank deeper than the Titanic, they plotted (with the help of Jwannhn's mommy) to have a "movie night" But the next day, disaster struck.

Hi guys! Ok, I have a plan. I was thinking of having a sleepover some weekend this summer and I've found out that this weekend is the only one that looks really good for my family. Remembering what Cassius had suggested on Sunday, I was thinking of all of us getting together this Friday night. We'd swim, go to Rita's Italian ice up the road, watch a movie, talk the whole night...you get the picture. ;-) Saturday, I'm not sure what we'd do...maybe swim some more, (do some of you have work?)and of course, Rudolph's "thing" is in the evening. So, let me know what you think ASAP. Love your mature friend,
~*~Cornelius~*~

This, thought Cassius, Jwannhn, Bernard, and Karl, was an excellent improvement on their little plan of the previous night. But things are seldom what they seem...

Cornelius, I don't care if you have a sleepover at your house. None of my plans were firm, so you're not planning on top of me. Hope to see you all soon,
Jwannhn

[Editor's note: Everyone was very pleased that noone planned on top of Jwannhn, because he is very slight and may have been totally squished by the weight!]


I will not be at prayermeeting. If you finalize plans, give me a call. I will most likely working or in class, so leave a message. XXX-XXX-XXXX And let me know what Rudolph says.
Bernard

Bad Bernard! Anyway, are we watching P&P still? We shouldn’t if Cassius decides to canoe…because the whole point was for her to see it. I’m game for almost anything... Are we swimming, too? I hope it’s as hot as it has been the past few days! I haven’t been swimming in ages.
Karl

*looks pleadingly at Cassius* Karl, are you talking about watching P&P at my house or with Rudolph? I was thinking that you guys can come anytime after 4pm on Friday. BTW, Do you guys have any suggestions for a movie for Friday night? Bring any and all suggestions to prayer meeting!
Cornelius

Just so you all know, I will be bringing my sociology book cuz I have 4 chapters to catch up on and 2 assignments to write for Monday. (Meaning, I will probably fall asleep in P&P just like I have a tendency to do with late night movie marathons. *cough*)Bernard

For any confused EX-parrots: don’t come to my house on Friday. Go to Cornelius’ at/ about 4pm. Saturday night is off, so don’t go to Friendly’s.
Jwannhn

That sounds like a great plan Karl. I'm confused too, though. How could you make those plans on Sunday when I hadn't mentioned a sleepover at my house? Is there another sleepover or something like that? Enlighten me!! Cheerio!
Cornelius.

okay, now I feel really bad. Sorry about all this confusion, but I had NO idea you had planned something else. *humbly begs for pardon* Are you sure you don't mind, Jwannhn?
Cornelius

Well, as one can see, CONFUSION marked this whole day! Fortunately, neither Logkan, Steinbeck, nor Cassius really got involved, and therefore their brains were saved to scramble another day. Also fortunately, the sleepover happened. (not of course without a little teeny weeny bit more confusion, but I, being the philanthropic EX-Parrot, will spare you all) There was no drama involved. Cornelius, Bernard, Steinbeck, Logkan, Jwannhn, and Karl all went to Cassius' house. Everyone except Karl cooked lots of good stuff. Karl washed dishes...some of them several times! One of the things that were cooked was PIZZA! All of them, ex-parrots and otherwise, ate lots of pizza. They topped it off with some brownies. Then all migrated to Cornelius' house. There they ate M&M's and Snickers and Doritos to their hearts' contents. Not, of course, until after they had EXERCISED by swimming in the swimming pool.

[BTW: Karl has been miserable at both exercising AND dieting...but more on that next post...if ever]

Pride and Prejudice was a hit. But the ex-parrots and co. were very tired by the end. In fact, Karl nearly fell asleep mid-movie, and this is the parrot who watched all three volumes of LotR-extended back to back and then went to work!

Well, Karl went home to do Greek, or whatever he does with his time, the next morning. He was shocked, and even saddened, when Steinbeck, instead of going home with him, went off with Bernard!

The next day being Sunday, Karl had another opportunity to talk to all the (sleepy) parrots, etc. It had just occurred to him that his family was going to be OUT OF TOWN on his BIRTHDAY! He made sure that all his friends were aware of this fact by complaining incessantly.

Pieces of Eight! Pieces of Eight! SQUAWWWK! Pieces of Eight!

Bernard and Steinbeck had not forgotten Karl's birthday. Do you remember when I told you that Steinbeck had gone off with Bernard? Well, it was not (only) for fun, but also for to buy presents for Karl. Now, these were not the sort of presents Karl would necessarily use, but they were funny. Karl is using the keychain that says "Official space cadet." Bernard had invited Karl and Steinbeck over for Peanut Butter Milkshakes (NOT mustard ones). Karl had invited Jwannhn and Rudolph. Well, as it turns out THIS was a birthday party for Karl. Karl was sufficiently surprised and managed not to get soaked with water when it was thrown at him. He very much appreciated most of his presents. He did not, however appreciate the dog treats. He presented them to Alkman and Cedric Junior.

That was the FIRST unexpected Birthday party.

The second was like unto the first. But it, unfortunately, was expected. So I have belied my post title. 'Tis true tis pity, and pity 'tis. tis true.

Bernard was having a surprise party the NEXT week. He was a teeny bit suspicious, but Steinbeck managed to tell him about it!

It was a fun party and involved Jwannhn falling all over the floor and trying to chase balloons in an exciting one-man version of "keep the balloon from hitting the ground."

Things have happened since then, but the EX-Parrot is tired of writing and, consequently will discontinue it.